What's Next

After doing sales and project management for several years before getting married, I was ready to leave it all and become a full-time mother. That led into a full-time homeschooling mother, which required more sacrifice than I ever thought I was capable of! And looking back, those were the most magical and rich years of my life. After the girls were in school for a couple years we pulled them back out to travel. This year Tennie left home for college, Adele got her driver's license (a.k.a. wings to fly) and Ceci is fully engaged with school and friends. And I'm asking myself, "what do I want to do with the rest of my life?"

It never occurred to me that the at-home, non-stop motherhood phase would end, or that I would be at a place where I would need to rediscover my interests. I'm not the same person I was 18 years ago. I feel like I have way too many skills to go get a job at some store in the mall, yet I feel unqualified for a "real" job, maybe lacking a little confidence because of my lack of consistent experience. And while mothering is demanding every day while children are growing up, it is also flexible and meaningful. What can possible be as rewarding?

I've been asking myself these questions since school started last fall, but I'm not quite ready to answer them. I feel like I want some time to work on some personal and family projects that I've wanted to get to for years. I want to take some time to really reconnect with myself. Thankfully, Geoff is very supportive of allowing me time to focus on myself. And I DO still have two children at home, even if they are out with friends more and more. I don't want anything to take away from quality time I can spend with them. But in less than five years when the house is empty, I want to be ready to fill that void with something meaningful, and I want to take my time contemplating and discovering what that something will be.

This year, in an effort to reestablish habits of self-care, I am meditating every morning for 30 minutes. This has been AMAZING so far! I'm hooked. I'm also trying to get back in shape, so I'm doing yoga three times per week, walking, hiking, snowshoeing, and I even got some rollerblades for Christmas! Meditation and yoga have interested me in chakras, the power of breathing, and working on the discipline of getting my mind to be in the same place as my body (which I assure you is a monumental feat!) I'm working on mindfulness, more effectively managing my emotions and understanding the body's power to heal itself, all wrapped up in my understanding of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Having the time to slow down a bit to give myself this time is a tremendous gift. I am so grateful.

Geoff's dad and his wife, Robin, gave us and all of his siblings an emergency preparedness book for Christmas called The Prepper's Blueprint. As a family we are working on one chapter a month, having a call at the end of each month to return and report. Each chapter has a good chunk of stuff to do, but it's manageable. I have been wanting to get ourselves better prepared for a long time. We peeked in our 72-hour kits at Christmas and saw we had size 4 clothing in there! It is time to update! This family project is a commitment of time, and it is our priority this year.

Geoff and I have a personal goal to learn to live by a budget. I mean, we've always known about how much we spend and where it goes, but we want to learn to be more aggressively accountable for our money, and we're trying to teach the girls as we go. Maybe I'll write about that more in another post.

Adele and Ceci both want to become active in their talent agency again. They are old enough to invest a little more into developing skills. This is a fun diversion as well as good, quick money. We've spent the last few weeks doing what it takes to reengage, and hopefully they'll have some fun opportunities soon.

So while life on the surface feels still, there is a lot going on under the surface. It is the perfect place to be during these winter months!

Snapshot of Adele – Part 2

Adele is totally uncomfortable with me writing about her. She isn’t one who likes a lot of attention. But I want to capture this time in her life! 

Geoff’s family has a tradition that we have carried on in our family. On one’s birthday, during dinner, everyone goes around the table and says something they love about the birthday person. We all do it in our individual families, but we also do it over text, or when we gather. I’m going to include what family had to say about Adele on her 17^th birthday:

Brittany

Happy birthday darling Adele! You are the personification of pure goodness. Your desire to do what is right, awareness of others and their feelings, and selfless nature is inspiring to me. You are beautiful inside and out and I love your effortless style and grace. I would always choose to be around you and love telling stories, laughing and spending time with you. You bring light into every room you walk into and I truly admire the woman you are! I love you sweet Delo!

Ingrid

I love all the things Britt said about you, Adele! And I love your genuine kindness to little kids and babies. I love your artistic talents and flair. I love your adorable handwriting. I love how much you love to be together with family. I love your good ideas and your commitment to follow through on them. I love your desire to make a difference and change the world. I love your wisdom and ability to assess situations. I love you so much, Adele, and hope you are filled to overflowing with how much this family adores you!!!

Ian

Happy Birthday Del!! You are awesome in so many ways. You are thoughtful and always mindful of others. You have a great eye for beautiful things and you are an amazing artist. You are funny and make others feel funny. It is always fun to be around you. Hope you have an incredible day turning 17!!

Erica

17 is crazy! I feel I just barely grew out of being 17. In some ways I can’t believe you are so old, and in others you have seemed so mature for so long that it seems like it’s about time that your age catches up to your soul.  You are wise and kind and thoughtful and creative and socially exceptionally talented. You bring people together in significant ways and are a remarkable power for good. You are gentle and sensitive. I love you!  Happy Birthday!

Booch

Happy Birthday Adele! I love your personality so much! You are such and incredible human being, your smile is contagious, your heart is as big as the ocean, your soul is purely golden good, your joy for life shines through your eyes, your love for adventure is unmatched, your love for your family is adorable, and your talents flow from every part of your being. You are so much fun to be around and you have a way of making everyone you talk to feel so special. We are so grateful to be in your family and honored to be able to watch you grow as a beautiful young lady. We hope this is your best birthday and your most amazing year yet. Love you always! Happy birthday!

Lucie (cousin)

Happy birthday Adele!!!! Also, this is Lucie ‘yo!

Nikki

Happy happy birthday, Delo!!!! I love SO many things about you! I love how much you invest in people. You love fully and unconditionally and fiercely! You prioritize people and experiences over everything else. I love how special and appreciated and awesome you make me feel every single time I come to your house or you see me. You really know how to make people feel like a million bucks! I love how thoughtful and kind and sensitive you are, and how you’d do anything or give anything in the world for anyone else. I love how passionate are about helping people and how determined and resourceful you are at finding ways to help people. I love how adventurous and fearless you are when you travel. You are one amazing chickadee and I am so grateful to be in your family. I love you so much. Happy day, sweet 17!

Poppop

Happy Birthday Adele. You are really a unique individual. It’s been a great privilege to watch you grow up and to be a part of your life. Thanks for your kindnesses and love. You have so many talents and great gifts. I hope and pray you feel good about the way you use them in your life.

  

Me

Adele has had many family and personal trials, all of which she has pushed through with such admirable grit and determination. She pushes, sometimes for years and years, without giving up, and has come through stronger and better for it.

Ceci

Adele is always really quick to apologize. Or if she sees that her mood or behavior is affecting another’s in a negative way, she is quick to change and say sorry.

There are some obvious themes through everyone’s kind words. I’ll let those speak for themselves.

But a few more things:

Adele loves lists – lists of things she wants to learn, do, tasks or any other possible list of something!

Adele loves little books and journals to practice lettering, drawing or to make lists and calendars.

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Adele LOVES plants.

Adele receives love by getting small, thoughtful gifts or notes. One time, a few years ago, she asked if she could give me some money so I could buy things and leave them on her pillow. Mental note taken. I didn’t take her money, but she gets small surprises on her bed often.

She also leaves very kind notes, or notes of apology frequently.

Adele adores our cat Mila.

She always has a candle burning in her room. And she always smells good.

Adele is not a time-waster. She likes to be DOING stuff.

In summary, to know Adele is to love her.

Snapshot of Adele – Part 1

I’m going to start doing snapshots of the birthday person that will include more specific details about what they are doing and their hobbies, interests and pursuits at the time. Sometimes some details get lost in only mentioning events, so this may help capture a little more of the personality and person on a given year.

(PHOTO CREDIT: All photos in Adele's snapshot posts were taken by Tennie's friend Lindsay during a trip to the Salt Flats this past fall.)

Starting this past year, Adele began to grow. She has always been super petite, and probably always will be, but people are not mistaking her for three years younger anymore. She is looking older and taller. Right along with that growth came a huge launch of self. Her characteristics have always been there, but they are manifesting themselves in bigger, more obvious ways. Getting a driver’s license helped. This girls always wanted to go places, and now she is off!

She was uncertain where she wanted to go to school this past fall. She wanted a certain reality for herself, and after much deliberation, she created it for herself. She returned to her old school, but chose to take AP and Honors classes in core subjects, except math which she is doing on her own at her own pace during flex periods. This means not meeting state requirements or getting a paper high school diploma, which means she will apply to college as a "homeschool" student, but this also allows her to pursue what she loves and not sit bored in classes she doesn't find interesting. It was a great creation for herself.

She went after an internship at the IRC (International Rescue Committee) where she now teaches the beginner English class once a week to a handful of refugees. She is exploring getting a ESL certificate in the next year at the Salt Lake Community College. She LOVES working with refugees and is constantly finding possible summer opportunities to work in refugee camps around the world, humanitarian jobs she would be excited about, etc. The world will be open to her when she turns 18!

She got a job at Target making $12.50 an hour over the holidays. It was simply a job to make money for her to pursue dreams. She is an amazing saver and has an unusual knack at money management and responsibility. She also has a great business sense. One of Geoff’s favorite stories to tell about Adele is a time when he was trying to help her with a hard school subject when she was maybe 10 or 11, and she wasn't wanting to do it. He facetiously said, “You better work on this or you’ll be working at McDonalds your whole life.” Adele quickly retorted, “I’ll be the CEO of McDonald’s!”

Just since Christmas she has decided to give Decca a go. She’s a little late to the game, but her friends are helping her and she is going for it. I think she will compete in hospitality management, at least that was her direction as of this past week. I’m proud of her for talking something new and unfamiliar. This is characteristic of her this past year.

She is the co-chair of the youth board for Choice Humanitarian, a local humanitarian organization. This entails helping at Choice events, but it is also a fundraising endeavor. They meet monthly, and then before a fundraising event those meetings are weekly. She organizes the board members and leads the meetings.

This year she is in charge of the girl’s camp at church. The stake and ward leaders want the young women to develop leadership abilities, so they assist, when needed, but the young women plan the camp. This year they chose one leader, Adele, to oversee all other committees. Adele is totally capable of this. It will really rev up over the next few months.

And then there is SAT prep. She’s got big decisions for her big future ahead!

Lastly, for today, Adele has a great group of friends. They are all smart, high-achieving young women, all on the petite side, and a powerful force. They all have a great style and love to shop together; they love Pho Soup and Coffee Houses (Adele is a big hot drink lover and loves herbal teas); she meets her friend Sami for yoga once a week and they all study together, sometimes over Facetime until the wee hours of the night.

To be continued…

The Dancing Queen is 17!

I don’t know about you at your house, but Mama Mia soundtracks are common listening fare, and it was obvious that Dancing Queen would be a theme song on Adele’s 17^th birthday; it was played, on signs, on friend’s Instagram stories and she even did a post herself using it.

Adele had her whole Saturday birthday planned out for weeks. First sleep in until 9:00, then breakfast (eggs, sausage and potatoes), then yoga at Core Power Yoga, followed by the traditional treasure hunt and presents. Our treasure hunt’s first clue is always on the fridge, just like it was when I was a girl. Tennie did the clues this year. They’re getting trickier and harder to come up with!

Adele loves lots of gifts. We have a birthday budget for gifts and a party. They can spend the party money or keep it for themselves. These days most of that money is saved, but when I asked Adele how much she wanted me to spend on gifts she replied, “All of it!” She had a long wish list (as she did for Christmas), and most of the items were relatively inexpensive, so she had a pile of gifts at the end of the hunt.

On with her planned day, we headed to lunch at Sawadi (favorite Thai restaurant), followed by Menchies Frozen Yogurt where two of her best friends met us. From there we broke off from Geoff, Tennie (who was in town for the big day) and Ceci and went with her two friends up to a friend’s Heber house for the night. I was along to cook a little and be a token chaperone, but these are good friends who laughed and did funny things all night. I checked out as they started their movie marathon at 9:00PM! Those crazies stayed up until 4:30AM! Here is Alexa, Adele and Raja, late night extraordinaires. 

Yesterday those girls had a late morning before we headed home. In the afternoon Geoff’s family gathered at our place for a potluck taco salad bar, more gifts and relishing in cute Adele being 17.

How is it possible? How does the time of childhood pass so slowly when they are young and then speed up in their teens so that we blink and they’re grown?

Happiest 17th, dancing queen!

Historian

As I mentioned, I created books out of several years of our old blog. I'm not sure how many hours it took, but it was A LOT of hours. But these were delightful hours of rereading a magical season of childhood and homeschooling and living with Geoff's parents in Auburn, California.

I used a sight called Lulu. Every other blog-to-print website I found had lame formats that wasted a lot of space and made pictures too small for my preference. With Lulu, I chose my book size, paper quality, etc., downloaded a Word template and cut and paste each date, title, text paragraph and picture from the blog to the word document. That is where the hours were spent, cutting and pasting, but the end result looks just like the blog with large, colorful photos.

While the picture quality is compromised a little bit, it is good enough. While the binding is not the highest quality out there, it works. And each 500+ page volume only cost roughly $100.

I had made one of our year in France a few years ago. These four volumes are such a treasure!!!

The family history began when Tennie was born in 2000, while Geoff was in grad school in Cambridge, Massachusetts. To keep family living on the West coast up to date I started a weekly email called, Hello from Boston. Each person in the family got a paragraph about what they were up to that week. The paragraphs included milestones, quotes, behaviors, stories and events.

We moved to Seattle in 2001 and the emails were changed to Hello from Seattle. I had lost several years worth, but bless my mom! She had saved those emails and compiled them for me for Christmas one year. Last month I found the first two years that were missing on old floppy disks, bought a floppy disk reader and am working on those. There were no pictures attached to those Hello emails, so a big project on my list is to add pictures and create books like the blog books. And then I have six years of living in Utah to turn into books. Heavens, this is an enormous project and labor of love! And it is still going!

As I've read through amazing detail of years and years of family life, I realized the significance of my role as historian. I envisioned exactly what I'm creating now, the history of our family, but I had no idea the value of the information. The personality characteristics of our girls was remarkably evident from toddlerhood, if not infancy; the medical information; the growth and struggle; the evidence, in hindsight, of God's miraculous and merciful hand in our lives; the humor of my account; the priceless memories and quotes; and the picture of the amazing life Geoff and I worked to create for our children. It is all there, in detail. I marvel that I found the time, that I made the time, when there were often very difficult obstacles in my life. Somehow I stuck with it and made it a priority.

I must admit that the time on the tail end has made me want to simplify what I record now and how often. I also realized several traditions that haven't been captured, small things that are part of our daily lives. And there are many significant lessons I've learned that I want as part of this history. I want my children to know what truths strengthened me through life's journey. So moving forward, I am hoping to capture some of those things amidst the general happenings around here.

Lastly, these books capture all that was good. My private journals go into detail about my hardships and struggles. I'm glad they are separate. I remember struggling with depression during different seasons I read about while creating the books, the change Geoff's illness had on our family, or the angst about a particular child that accompanied long years of otherwise happy hubbub. Our lives are real. We all have our deep waters to pass through. But as I read over almost two decades of family life, I realized that all works out in the end. God is with us. Life is good.

December Wrap-Up

December was a good month! We spent Christmas at home with just our family for the first time in over 10 years! The girls were a bit nervous that it would be terrible and boring, so I took it upon myself to have a few surprises.

We did our annual advent challenges, and we hid our little elf every day where occasionally there are small treats or gifts, but I noticed that days would go by where no one looked in the advent pocket OR for the elf, so that tradition may be fading out with age.

When the girls were younger the challenges were super simple. Here is one of our old lists:

Tell someone something you like about them

Wish someone a Merry Christmas

Do something nice for someone (but don’t let them know!)

Thank Heavenly Father for Jesus in your prayers

Read the nativity story

Draw a picture of the nativity

Tell someone you love them

Draw a picture or write a note to someone who is lonely

Visit someone who is sick

Sing a Christmas carol about Jesus

Play or talk to someone you normally don’t play or talk with

Make someone smile

Do something nice for mom without being asked

Draw a picture to say thank you for someone you appreciate

Spend some time playing with Kipper

Cheer someone up who is sad

The past few years we upped our game. I don't have this year's complete list, but here are some from previous years:

Learn the definition of the word peacemaker.  Find a scripture that teaches about peacemakers.  Pray that you can develop this quality.  What is the Savior’s role?* 

Listen to the First Presidency Devotional and share with your family your favorite part.

Do something nice for someone (but don’t let them know)!

Learn more about the sacrament.  Read Matt. 26:26-28; Mark 14:22-24; and Luke 22:17-20.  Establish a pattern of pondering during the sacrament.  Ask, “what can I do to improve?”  Listen for the Spirit.  What is the Savior’s role?*

Read the nativity story tonight by candlelight.

Visit someone who is sick or lonely.  It can be someone your age, an older person, or a call to a family member.  Be thoughtful.

Send a Christmas Card/Letter to Mormom.  She is lonely and this will give her some Christmas cheer.

Write a letter of gratitude to one of your teachers at church or school.

Heavenly Father has given you special gifts.  Read 1 Corinthians 12:4-12; 13; Moroni 7 12-13; 10:8-18; and Doctrine & Covenants 46:11-26.  Ask a family member to write down positive qualities the Lord has given you.  List these gifts in your journal, and write how you can continue to develop these gifts and use them to serve your family and others.  What is the Savior’s role?*

Write a note to someone telling them something specific that you admire or appreciate.

Write your testimony of the Savior in your journal.

Do something nice for mom without being asked.

Spend an hour doing Family History.  Take some of the names you find to the temple before Christmas.

Read about repentance in Isaiah 1:18; Alma 26:22; 34:30-35; Moroni 8:25-26; and Doctrine and Covenants 19:15-20; 58:42-43.  Discuss with the family what repentance means.  Apply the principles of repentance in your life.  What is the Savior’s role?*

Attend A Christmas Carol and then use Article of Faith 13 to evalutate what you saw and heard.  How can you use this Article of Faith as a guide for all you do so the Holy Ghost will be your constant companion?  What is the Savior’s role?*

Conduct a self-assessment of your personal integrity.  Ask yourself the following questions:  Do I avoid gossip, inappropriate jokes, swearing and profanity, and being light-minded about sacred subjects?  Am I completely truthful, morally clean, honest, dependable, and trustworthy in my schoolwork and other activities?  Today pray for strength and for the guidance of the Holy Ghost to help you live with integrity.  What is the Savior’s role?*

Read Doctrine & Covenants 18:10 and 121:45.  Do all you can to build others and make them feel of worth.  From now until Christmas notice the worthwhile qualities and attributes of others.  Acknowledge them verbally or in writing.  What is the Savior’s role?*

While in McCall choose to only speak kind, uplifting words.  Withhold any criticism or judgement.

Smile and wish a Merry Christmas to everyone you pass on the way to TRAX today.

Send an email or text to Babsie.  Tell her about your life, and wish her a Merry Christmas.  

Make grandma’s day by writing her an email telling her something you love about her.  

Read a story/article in the Friend, New Era or Ensign.

Talk to someone at school that you don’t normally talk to.  See if you can find out three things about them.

Give a specific prayer giving thanks for the birth of the Savior.

Learn about satisfying spiritual hunger (start with John 6:35)

Have a special lunch outing with mom/dad.

Point out a virtue in something that they don't see in themselves.

Eat lunch with someone new at school/work.

Secretly do something nice for someone in the family.

Learn about the problems in another country. Say a united prayer in their behalf.

Geoff took a trip to Mexico City for work, and I sent him and Tennie the challenges while he was gone.

We got ALL of our Christmas decorations out, which leaves no shelf or surface space empty! All of the Danish nisse and German nutcrackers, and European Christmas market treasures made the house feel super cozy and magical! On Christmas Eve we gave our annual Christmas ornament.

Our cat Mila really liked the ornaments.

Ceci's performance as Scrooge was fun, and we saw A Christmas Carol at Hale Theater too. I don't remember where this picture was taken, but it was in December!

We went to an amazing Christmas concert by The Lower Lights with our friends, the Serafins. Wow that was fun!

We attended a Kids For Kids fundraising concert put on by some of our friends where kids organize and perform and raise money for a cause. This particular concert was for a refugee center in Greece. They raised $10,000! We had plans for a sleigh ride in Midway, but it is hard to go on a sleigh ride with no snow! That fun outing will be postponed until a future date. But there was enough snow to open a few runs at Park City where Geoff and the girls have passes this year.

We also did a little ice-skating one weekend with a few of Tennie's college friends who also spent the weekend.

They also made lots of Christmas crafts.

We went and saw the lights on Temple Square twice.

Best of all was helping a family with Christmas and collecting and distributing coats to those that need them. These endeavors would have stressed me out if I hadn't had the luxury this year of getting most Christmas shopping and preparations done before Thanksgiving. It was nice to have the season to look outward.

I turned FORTY-EIGHT! To ease the pain, Geoff bought me a new phone! I'm so excited to have the nice camera! Now I just have to learn how to use it!

Christmas Eve we started a new tradition a woman at church mentioned - to emphasize the light of Christ. With all the lights off I lit a taper candle. I then lit the person next to me, she lit the person's next to her and so on. When all were lit we talked about how we can fill the world with light, Christ's light within us. We shared some scriptures and the girls ended up being obsessed with the melted wax. But they still felt the peace and truth of the point!

But the biggest and most time consuming and most exciting gifts for me to give were our old blog's Auburn years printed into three volumes (more on this in another post soon) and digitizing our old video camera's small cassette tapes, comprising the years 2000-2005. None of us had seen these videos since we took them! We opened these last on Christmas morning and it was a worthy staying-home-as-a-family-can-be-cool surprise! We spent all day Christmas day, and many days since, watching these movies and laughing and remembering, and on Geoff's and my part, longing a little bit. It seems like a lifetime ago, and yet time has slipped by so quickly.

Our Christmas break has been a little more busy than we anticipated, but still wonderful to be together. Geoff, Adele and Ceci got in a car accident (all are ok), which meant we had to buy a new car suddenly. That took some time and decision making. Ceci spent six days, post-Christmas with a nasty, nasty cold and missed precious open days skiing. The day she was back on her feet, Tennie and I woke up with it, and that is giving me a lot of time to lay around and read and watch movies and work on things like this post. (As a mom, sometimes being sick is the only time to be forced out of commission!) So Adele and Tennie had plans with friends on New Years, but Geoff and I stayed home and tried to be fun and exciting with sick Ceci. I don't think we succeeded...

It has been an eventful, challenging and exciting year. What rich memories! We're all looking forward to 2019. Life is full of surprises!